Posts tagged ‘Miami Heat’

March 7, 2011

“The World is Better Now Since the Heat is Losing”

by Jeeves

 

The title of this post is a direct quote from Dwyane Wade after the Heat’s latest “heart-breaking” loss to the Bulls. To me, it perfectly sums up the Heat and their legacy, to date. It’s deliciously self-centered and absurdly over the top.

Before jumping into the psyche of the Miami Heat, let’s take a look at some interesting facts. The Miami Heat’s record currently stands at 43-20 amidst a 4-game losing streak. Not bad, but not great. To put it in perspective, the Heat need to finish the season 19-0 to beat the Cleveland Lebron’s record from last season. It’s really quite incredible. The sum of the parts in Miami (Lebron+Wade+Bosh+the rest) will amount to less than the sum of the parts in Cleveland (Lebron+1/2 a season of Jamison+yeaaah, the rest). That’s all a far cry from their grand aspirations and the lofty predictions (will shatter the Bulls 72-10 record) of the pundits. The Heat are a great team against the dregs and the also-rans of the league. It’s against the upper-tier where they struggle. They are 1-9 against the Spurs, Mavs, Lakers, Celtics and Bulls, the 5 teams who appear to be their chief rivals in the quest for a championship. If you take out those 10 games from their schedule, they are scoring 8.5 pts per game more than their opponents. They’re basically blowing everyone else out. (As a point of comparison, the 1995-1996 Bulls had an average margin per game of about 12 points, against all comers).

Under normal circumstances, people would point to the fact that this team is still figuring out how to play with each other. People would note that beyond the Two and a Half Men, their isn’t much of a supporting cast and that it’s only a matter of time before they figure out some successful late game sets. This isn’t a normal situation, though. Instead of tempering expectations due to a litany of reasons, people (myself included) are enjoying the Heat’s struggles with a fiendish glee. You know what? I think we are fully justified in enjoying their misery. When a <del>team</del> trio takes to the stage in such an appalling manner, to celebrate the pure awesomeness of their union, they are not allowed to be offended when there’s a righteous backlash against them. When a troika of individuals proclaim themselves ready to win EIGHT championships, they are not allowed to bemoan their ‘us vs the world’ predicament. When a threesome of egotists start referring to themselves as the Heatles, they are not allowed to seek sympathy through the media. The Heat have sown the seeds of ill-will and hate and have to deal with the consequences. My advice to them: suck it up, and stop whining to the media that no one loves you. If you want the media and basketball fans around the country to stop feasting on your tears, then man up, stop crying and figure out how to win a close game. Until them we’ll all enjoy their tears of unfathomable sadness.

 

February 25, 2011

Chris Bosh had a Rough Night

by Jeeves

The .5 in the Miami Heat’s Big 2.5 had himself a rough, rough night. Not only did his Miami Heat lose to the Bulls in Chicago falling to 1-6 against the top-5 teams in the league, but he was one of the main factors contributing to the loss. Bosh went a whopping 1-18 from the field. You read that correctly one for freakin’ eighteen. It was the worst shooting performance by a player since Tim Hardaway went 0-17 back in 1991. Bosh also had the most misses in a game since Mike Newlin went 1-22 in 1973. Bosh’s performance was, without exaggeration, historically bad. To add insult to injury, he was also outrebounded by Lebron James, Luol Deng, and Omer Asik (who played half the amount that Bosh did). To really put the cherry on top, there’s the horrendous flop you can see in the .gif above or the video below:

I really, really wish the league could retroactively fine him for that flop job. I’m a big soccer fan and that’s way worse than what you normally see...this video, notwithstanding.

I would love to be a fly in the wall in the Heat locker room tonight. It would be really interesting to see how Lebron treats Bosh after this performance, especially after Bosh dissed his teammate by saying he’d vote for Rose as MVP. It’s one thing to be honest and forthright to the media, it’s another thing to be honest at the expense of one of your teammates. Lebron did say he’s taking names of those that disrespect him; I guess we’ll have to wait and see if he puts Chris Bosh on his list.

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February 4, 2011

Friday Photo: Check out these Tricks

by Jeeves

Each Friday we bring you funny/odd/offbeat photos from the week before. As always hover over the pics for bonus captions.

Today’s picture has Kodi Augustus trying to win himself a Big Mac.


After the jump two more pics

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February 2, 2011

Heat Excuses Flow Like Milk and Honey in the Holy Land

by npiller88

As the season wears on, the Miami Heat have given fans of mediocre NBA squads a reason to look forward to the playoffs, if only to root against the new evil empire (think David Stern is happy about that? Yep). But leave it to the Heat to temper the expectations of their, ahem, fans? (wouldn’t want to seem overconfident. After all its not like the organization ever put up a banner that said “Yes We Did” after acquiring the two most outstanding free agents in the 2010 class and parading the “Big Three” around a stage with smoke machines and a light show)

Lebron had this to say in comparing the playoff chops of the Heat to those of more seasoned teams like the Boston Celtics:

“We’re way behind those guys,” Lebron James said following the Heat’s practice on Wednesday. “Just look at the number of games played, the number of playoff series those guys have had. We’re only a few months in together — 40-something-plus games. I’ve seen the statistics. Boston has like 250-plus games played together. We’re way behind those teams.”

It’s as if Lebron wants spectators to hear, “yes we know we are awesome, but we can’t guarantee a championship.” In fact, the heat seem to be displaying pretty solid chemistry so far this year, at least as its reflected in scoring differential (+7.8 points per game, highest in the NBA). And now that it appears Lebron’s bad tweet karma has worn off (the team is 4-1 in the last four games), there doesn’t seem to be a real cause for concern in Miami. Of course, knowing Lebron’s Hindu Guru reputation (thanks, Jeeves), we’ll have to keep our eye on his next few tweets to see if there’s any indication of a sudden dip in performance.

But this strategy of “managing expectations” really gets at the heart of the struggle the Heat will always face. Right at the moment that the franchise decided to go all out with a carnival of arrogance (“Yes We Did,” “Karma’s a Bitch,” etc.), or even earlier, at the moment the team signed James and Bosh, expectations were sky high, and for good reason. I remember saying at the time that anything less than a championship would be seen as a failure by most fans (many of whom will be rooting for MUCH less than a championship for this team). It’s too late to prepare the fans and haters for potential failure, because the Heat invited those high expectations from the beginning. I’m not one of these guys who claims Lebron jeopardized his legacy by joining the super team, but it is true that such high expectations (something he faced to a far lesser extent in Cleveland), are likely to lead to an emotional letdown of some sort.

There is simply no way the heat can justify the hype (and silence the haters) without a championship. But Lebron seems to be trying to find a way to do just that. His quote reads sort of like: “Just so you know, if we lose to the Celtics in the Eastern Conference Finals, it won’t be because we’re not as good as they are, just because they’ve played together more.” Maybe he should have saved this for the Eastern Conference Finals. Let the letdown (or uplift, for most fans) commence.

January 28, 2011

Lebron James, Hindu Guru

by Jeeves

Perhaps we were a bit too harsh on Lebron.  Maybe, just maybe, we jumped the gun on condemning him. For those of you with short memories, the entirety of the Interwebs got all up in arms over this infamous tweet:

Crazy. Karma is a b****.. Gets you every time. Its not good to wish bad on anybody. God sees everything!

At the time it was assumed that the tweet was a direct response to the thrashing the Cavaliers had received earlier in the night, which I think was, indeed, a fair assumption. Seeing how things have played out in the days since, I think that Lebron may have had an ulterior motive. I think, deep down, he wanted to show us all just how strongly he believed in the tenet of karma. As they say, let’s take a look at the tape.

This is the timeline of James and the Heat since shooting off that tweet on January 11th:

January 12th – Lebron James sprains his ankle in a 105-111 loss to the Clippers

January 13th – Lebron James sits out with his bum ankle as the Heat fall again as they get pummeled by the Nuggets 102-130.

January 15th – Lebron James is on the bench again as the Heat lose a close one to the Bulls 96-99. Chris Bosh is also felled by a sprained ankle.

January 18th – Lebron James returns to action, just in time to lose in overtime to the Hawks 89-93.

January 22nd – Lebron James and the Heat thrash the Raptors 120-103, though Dwyane Wade is felled by a migraine

January 27th – Lebron James and the Heat lose 88-93 in New York

Do you see what has happened here? Since raising the issue of karma, Lebron and the Heat have suffered through 5 losses in 6 games and 2 sprained ankles and 1 massive migraine. I don’t know about you, dear readers, but it is clear to this writer that James whipped up that tweet, not  to spite the Cavaliers, but rather to seize the opportunity to prove the existence of karma. And to that, Lebron. I say, (for perhaps the first and last time) well done!